July 26th, 2008 by Jiles

Online personals and dating can be a very fun venue towards meeting that special someone. However, one’s safety should still be the top priority. Did you know that most online dating services do not pre-screen their users? This means that they cannot ensure that the people you meet through their sites are safe enough to be dealt with.

Here are a 6 things to make online dating safety and more fun:

1. Anonymity Raise Safety, For Awhile - Giving your real email address, personal web site URL, last name, phone number, place of work, home address, or any other information that identifies you in your profile or first few emails that you exchange with other members makes you an easy victim. Turn off your signature file, or make sure that it does not have any identifying information, when sending emails to a member through your own email.

2. Lean on Common Sense - Trusting your online acquaintances easily can make you easy bait. If your gut feel tells you that someone is lying, there’s a big chance that you are right. Look for someone that deserves your trust. Online intimacy is very dangerous. Don’t indulge yourself in such endeavor at the click of a mouse. Logical thinking will save you a lot of trouble.

3. Call First, Don’t Drool Just Yet - A person’s skills when it comes to communicating can be easily gauged through a phone call. Though it might cost you some moolah, it is worth it to make sure you don’t fall for someone who is anti-social. However, to make things a lot safer, use a cell phone or a pay phone instead of using your land line. Unless you are absolutely comfortable with the person you are calling, don’t give your home phone number at once.

4. Delay the Meeting - It is advisable to take your time and get to know the person as much as possible first before saying yes to a face to face meeting. You are free to change your mind if anything feels not right.

5. Psychoanalyze or End up with a Psycho - You should pay attention to any signs of intense frustration, anger or any displays of aggressive behavior. If the person is trying to control or pressure you, stop the communication. Here are the other alarming manifestations of bad behavior that will make you aware that you are in danger.

6. Offline Meeting - Before meeting your online friend, tell someone reliable where you will go and when you will return. Leaving your date’s name and phone number is a good idea. Bring your mobile phone. Don’t allow your date to pick you up at home. Have your own transportation and meet somewhere public. During the date, don’t leave your drink unattended.

To make online dating work, it is imperative that you exercise caution. Have ample time to get to know the other person, don’t rush yourself or allow anyone to rush you into doing anything. It’s better to be safe and dateless for a while than sorry.

July 16th, 2008 by Jiles

It can be difficult to be a woman in the dating arena. A lot of things can go wrong for you more so than for your male counterpart. Plus, men can be really dense about a few things. Well, no worries. Here are a few tips on what to do and not to do during a date:

1) Timing is important - Timing as in ‘on time’. No matter what they say, there is no such thing as ‘fashionably late’. For the first date, this can give the guy jitters and make him think that you’ve stood him up. For the later dates, having him wait for you in the living room for half an hour with either your roommate, your sister or, worse, your father is not something you want him to do - whether it be for the embarrassing stories or Dad’s ‘eyes of doom’.

2) Show interest - If you really like the guy, waiting for the call after a successful date is nerve-wracking. You know he’s interested and you’re definitely interested, you’re just waiting for him to call you so you could arrange another date. Talk about the date and how you had fun and give hints. No matter how dense he is, he should then pick up on it and ask you for another date!

3)  Do not complain - This may be technically part of tip three, but it deserves a separate heading. The way you phrase it and the tone you use is important here. ‘Venting’, like we do with our girl friends, is not going to go over well with him since he’ll probably misinterpret it. Grin and bear it then tell him after the date in calmly what your problem was.

4) Be nice - Have a positive attitude, find things that you like and tell him. Compliment him about his clothes, how he looks and how well the date is going. It also shows him that you’re taking notice of him and you appreciate him. But, don’t lie. Like I said, look at the bright side of things - the service of the restaurant may have been slow but the ambience was terrific.

5) Enjoy the date - A date is a chance to get to know each other and to enjoy yourselves. Have fun during the date. Try not to be hyper-critical, but just take things in your stride. If you’re not having fun, your date will notice and, trust me, he will get nervous which will probably start ruining the experience for both of you. Also, just let your guard down for a little while. Besides, if he doesn’t like you for you, why should you keep on dating?

6) Keep your head on straight - Yes, we all know dates are supposed to be fun, but knowing what’s going on is important both for your own safety and for your love life. Is your date acting suspiciously or is he just nervous? Maybe you’d want to end the date early or do something to calm him down. Is he taking notice of what you’re wearing or just ogling? The choice to either wink at him or just stare knowingly is up to you. Is his attention on you or the girl next to you? You might wish to reward him with a smile or a slap. Situational awareness is not just for soldiers on the front but also for young women on the prowl.

Well, there they are seven tips for dating success! Hopefully, this advice could help lead you through today’s tough tangle of relationships. Happy hunting!

July 10th, 2008 by Jiles

Before asking her out for a date, try to have some conversation together. This will be an opportunity for you to discover if your personalities and ideas are attuned with each other, before you do decide to ask her out for a date. When calling through the phone. Don’t forget to mention to her the conversations you had. This will give her the impression that you do listen, making her feel important. Then if you feel that it is time to ask her, go ahead; ask gently, not in a demanding manner. Never ask a girl out on a date in front of others, like her friends.

During the date:

Look good, be neat. Put extra effort to the way you look. Take the time be well groomed, smell nice and choose your clothes well. It must correspond to the place with which your date is set. Make a good impression, so you can charm her and she can be proud of you.

Do not be late. Prepare for the big day ahead. Make the necessary reservations and planning for your date. If you have planned for it, she will be impressed that you did put some effort on your night together. Be sure that during the big day you have no appointments so you won’t be cramming and be on time.

Be polite. Be sure to make her feel good by complementing the way she looks. And when seated at the table, turn your cell phone off. This will signal to her that you are very much interested in your moment together.

Say her name. Make it a point to say her name every so often in your conversations, to make her feel at ease and special.

Smile. Aside from putting up a positive attitude, your smile is an indication that you are happy to be with her.

Have a Sense of Humor. Making a woman laugh means you have won half your battle. This means that she is having a nice time and creates a positive atmosphere. This will be an occasion she would remember, because she had fun!

Be attentive. Listen to what she has to say, do not interrupt. Let her finish, before you state your opinion and make eye contact.

Be honest. Let her get to know you by telling her what you do and what interests you. If she does not like you for who you are, then she is not worth your time. Show interest in her too, by asking her about her work, hobbies and her likes. Be sensible and honest in initiating such conversations.

Relax. Do not worry that your date is not having a good time. Just manage yourself well and enjoy the evening. Keep the conversations open and ask questions. Be sincere.

Do not pretend. Pretending to be somebody that you’re not will not work in the long run. The truth will always come out sooner or later. It is a rewarding feeling if someone is drawn to you for who you really are.

Never compare. It will be very unfair of you if you compare your date to your past girlfriend. Keep in mind that she is a totally different person with her own personality. Take the time to discover her; you might be pleased if you do. Comparing won’t get you anywhere.

Never tell your date about the break-up of a previous relationship. Bury the past and move on. Here is a woman in front of you who is interested to know you more. Get to know her too, initiate a conversation that could lead to a common interest.

Enjoy. Dating should be exciting and relaxing. A woman can sense if you are enjoying your time with her or not. Don’t stress yourself trying so hard to make it the perfect date because it won’t be. But you both can enjoy it. After all, you did invite her out because you liked her in the first place. Be spontaneous and have fun.